Used.
The quiet is what i want,
But yet i’m not used to it.
Today is labour day,
Yet i felt like i worked all day.
Heading out is just a waste of money,
Staying home i can’t rest properly.
The room is in a mess yet i’m not packing,
Eventually till they scream then i’ll get moving.
Last night was the first time in my life,
I had a chat with my younger sis.
And it’s pretty funny cos,
We were talking on msn, though we’re just a room apart.
To prevent myself from thinking too much stuffs,
I bury myself in work, continue my biz,
But the recent spat of problems,
Has distracted me and my performance.
I packed my table just five days ago,
And threw all the trash in my trashbag.
Everything was packed and clean.
I came home last night, to face a series of horror.
My table looked like it got trashed up,
My room looked like the tamil tigers came,
My walls looked like it’s gonna fall apart.
All over the installation of one aircon.
Now i’m still using the dusty table,
I didn’t bother packing.
Kept them away from my room,
By lying that i’ll pack up later.
Today is Labour Day,
I felt more tired as the hours gone by.
Now is 3pm, and i’m only awake for the past 3 hrs.
- Big Sigh-
The more i see the aircon in my room,
The anger in me just grows.
I wanna smash it up,
But it costs me $800.
No one asked for payment,
But i think if everyone wants to enjoy,
Then we should help to chip in.
Maybe it’s just me who feels it this way.
I keep quiet,
I think less than 10 sentences a day.
I can’t ACT excited just because a new fridge came in,
Or just because i’m having an aircon.
I just can’t ACT at home,
All the trainings i had at work,
All the experiences i had at work,
All boils down to me feeling stupid acting.
There are friends whom i realli treasured,
Always wanna kept in touch,
But i’m tired of trying to keep contacting them.
All the people who didn’t bother to reply my smses.
For those who replied,
I’m busy,
I got church,
Not free.
And these were the people i once hold dear,
Now i didn’t bother anymore.
I used to like planning for gatherings,
Now i just look for people who looks for me.
Sick and tired of so many things,
I just wanna be alone.
Just in my own corner,
Doing my own things, at my own pace.
I read this awhile ago,
“People starts envying others,
Because they compare what they don’t have,
With what other people have.”
Why do so many people envy me?
These superficial views of me.
Envy my job,
Envy my outgoing character,
Envy my style of talking,
Envy my knowledge.
What’s there to envy?
I’m still me,
I still prefer to hang around in heartland areas.
Someone told me,
He don’t dare to hang out with me,
Because i’m now having a higher salary,
I MAY look down on him.
So i told him,
Don’t tell me this,
You just made me look down you,
For looking down on me.
I deserve my better pay,
Because i worked hard for it.
I was headhunted,
Because i proved myself for it.
People think Life is a bed of roses for me,
I just think i have the slight edge because of luck,
Other than that,
Maybe i put more effort than you.
Lastly, a phone call last night disturbed me.
This girl left me for a more handsome guy.
Then the guy cheated on her while she was doing her attachment in Australia.
Now she asking me out for a date.
Direct huh?
I may not be handsome,
At least i’m faithful to my girlfriends.
I may have alot of female friends,
But each time, only one girl can be in my heart.
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