Venue: Amk Library
Mood: Plain tired
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So after a long while,
I finally had time to do a little updates about myself,
I have so much things going on in my life,
I realli have no idea where to start.
Just to summarise:
Life is good to me and has always been good.
Just need to learn to appreciate more with my ears than my mouth.
That’s why God gives you 2 ears and 1 mouth.
I’m surprised to find myself typing my entry.
My life is so busy, i hardly have time for anyone.
It starts with my Biomerieux life,
Then to sch, and to ShanG.
As i continue my BM life,
Boss thinks highly of me,
Fellow colleagues are loving me,
The entire office is filled with my nonsense.
We worked hard,
And we enjoy the fruits of our labour.
All of us having this deep passion for the job,
And we received the recognition from our boss.
The managers leading me are helpful and supportive,
And in return, i made life in office brighter,
With laughters and jokes.
This is indeed an eye-opener for me.
There are many things i wish to go on,
But Bennie says my entries are too long.
Next is studies.
Yup, and tat’s about it. Period. 
ShanG has took a further step into building our foundation.
I’m currently in talks with 2 great companies,
Forming a partnership which will increase exposure of our companies.
I’m loving it~
Right now, the only thing holding me back,
Is my studies.
ONE MORE YEAR TO GO.
sucks.
Since Jan to now,
I will not say i walked a very rocky path,
As i’m pretty blessed this life.
Except the people whom i called “friends”.
I just can’t understand how peeps can have their mobile phones,
But reply a sms like 2 days later.
And i always hated people who doesn’t reply to my msn.
NOTE: it’s not later, it’s NEVER.
Well, if it’s an important friend,
Probably we won’t do that.
Ah well, maybe i’m not so important afterall.
But then again,
When i run forward a few steps,
And turn back.
I see the regrets on their faces,
I see them spending their time doing useless stuffs,
I see them doing nothing constructive in fact.
But it’s their lives.
To me, opportunity only knocks once.
Maybe some people won’t be bothered by this,
But to me,
I pity these bunch of aimless souls.
BUT BUT BUT BUT…
For those crazy guys who are in this with me,
Are certainly giving me the full assistance that they have.
And I appreciate them so much.
Let’s hope for a good run from now on.
Clarine @ 10.30am.
Shucks, i’m still home in my PJ.
Just a note to everyone.
If you wanna get help,
Do make sure you get the proper help.
Don’t get some, just because they are your good friends,
But can’t help you reach your dreams.
Some of my friends are like this.
When you created the first impossible dream,
And when you approach them,
They felt kinda ashamed.
But when they slowly see the dream forming,
They start approaching you,
Asking this and that,
Like as if everything interests them now.
And also,
A personal favour should be made to a personal friend.
NOT someone whom you treat that person.
Cos the person probably just treats you as a bouncing ball.
And this is not the first time.
But anyway,
Open my eyes wider,
And it’s time to stop using the heart.
Time to use my brain to work.
I shouldn’t be washing my dirty linen in public.
I love my family alot,
Though i’m an asshole most of the times,
I just wanna protect them from my heated temper.
If they hardly see me,
I will not have so much conflicts with them.
Maybe there will be more peace at home.
Not because they quarrel with me,
But because i don’t quarrel with them.
Honestly, i’m quite a sensitive freak.
I think too much to many things,
Including the previous post.
Still blindly thinking got hope.
Maybe i’m too money-minded now,
And Orangjuice said im’ still young, and childish,
No need to worry.
Yea.. Must tell myself that money is more important.
I think i’m really childish,
I can’t handle simple problems well.
Today at work, i was filled to the brim,
I almost wanted to burst out but controlled it down.
Running is not an excuse,
But keeping a distance seems to be perfect then.
The matter will never quit,
That’s why running is always tired.
Yet there is no good time to face it.
I know eventually my trusty e71 will break down someday,
Especially the way i’m treating it right now.
So i want our conversations to last forever.
Cos of how dearly i hold you close to my heart.
Many people would have thought we were together long ago,
Many too thought we look cute together.
Because between us,
We are true to each other, and supporting one another.
The little squabbles we had,
The smses of working hard together,
The dream of opening our own kopitiam,
The dreams of the many dreams we hope together.
Because i never once look down on you,
You look up to me.
Because i never once let you go,
You shared your heart with me.
You never once said nice things about me till yesterday.
You never once teared in front of me till yesterday.
You never once came early till yesterday.
And i never once felt helpess… till yesterday.
After so long,
Eventually we are together, yet not together.
The laughters, jokes, cranky talk and silly thinkings,
We dream the impossible, and you made that dream for me.
Right now, i hope you dearly as i held you then,
And i realised i can’t get rid of the simple girl,
Because of your simplicity,
You made being with you so enjoyable, and so sweet.
This is the only reason why i’m single,
This is also why you never hear i have a gf,
This is why i never tell you about love,
Because Love is here when we are together.
Honestly, i never understand LOVE very well.
But i know the sweetness of your smiles,
I know i dream the laughters of yours,
And i like just being with you.
And i just love you of who you were then,
Who you are now,
And who you will be in future.
We may never be together,
I may never go after you again,
I just hope not to destroy what we have,
I would prefer the “said nothing but wishing i had”,
than the “said something and wish i never had”.
As i told you,
Even if the whole world is against you,
I will still be by your side,
Building a world i call it “your own”.
Amids the seas of grammar errors,
These words came and touched my heart.
You are special, just being youself.
With no makeup, no pretences, just you and me.
“Really thanks for everything. A frenz (sic) like you is really hard to gt.
N I feel realli lucky. Last time i didn’t appreciate you in poly, always think
u r v petty. But i realised i’m wrong. So sry abt it.”
“Aiya, don’t sae till ‘m that great.. But in fact you really try all your best to help me.
I can feel the sincerely (sic) You noe i really feel much much better.
You care me more than…..”
“……Don’t worry, i m strong. I alr go through things tt is worst than tt. I can take it”
The quiet is what i want,
But yet i’m not used to it.
Today is labour day,
Yet i felt like i worked all day.
Heading out is just a waste of money,
Staying home i can’t rest properly.
The room is in a mess yet i’m not packing,
Eventually till they scream then i’ll get moving.
Last night was the first time in my life,
I had a chat with my younger sis.
And it’s pretty funny cos,
We were talking on msn, though we’re just a room apart.
To prevent myself from thinking too much stuffs,
I bury myself in work, continue my biz,
But the recent spat of problems,
Has distracted me and my performance.
I packed my table just five days ago,
And threw all the trash in my trashbag.
Everything was packed and clean.
I came home last night, to face a series of horror.
My table looked like it got trashed up,
My room looked like the tamil tigers came,
My walls looked like it’s gonna fall apart.
All over the installation of one aircon.
Now i’m still using the dusty table,
I didn’t bother packing.
Kept them away from my room,
By lying that i’ll pack up later.
Today is Labour Day,
I felt more tired as the hours gone by.
Now is 3pm, and i’m only awake for the past 3 hrs.
- Big Sigh-
The more i see the aircon in my room,
The anger in me just grows.
I wanna smash it up,
But it costs me $800.
No one asked for payment,
But i think if everyone wants to enjoy,
Then we should help to chip in.
Maybe it’s just me who feels it this way.
I keep quiet,
I think less than 10 sentences a day.
I can’t ACT excited just because a new fridge came in,
Or just because i’m having an aircon.
I just can’t ACT at home,
All the trainings i had at work,
All the experiences i had at work,
All boils down to me feeling stupid acting.
There are friends whom i realli treasured,
Always wanna kept in touch,
But i’m tired of trying to keep contacting them.
All the people who didn’t bother to reply my smses.
For those who replied,
I’m busy,
I got church,
Not free.
And these were the people i once hold dear,
Now i didn’t bother anymore.
I used to like planning for gatherings,
Now i just look for people who looks for me.
Sick and tired of so many things,
I just wanna be alone.
Just in my own corner,
Doing my own things, at my own pace.
I read this awhile ago,
“People starts envying others,
Because they compare what they don’t have,
With what other people have.”
Why do so many people envy me?
These superficial views of me.
Envy my job,
Envy my outgoing character,
Envy my style of talking,
Envy my knowledge.
What’s there to envy?
I’m still me,
I still prefer to hang around in heartland areas.
Someone told me,
He don’t dare to hang out with me,
Because i’m now having a higher salary,
I MAY look down on him.
So i told him,
Don’t tell me this,
You just made me look down you,
For looking down on me.
I deserve my better pay,
Because i worked hard for it.
I was headhunted,
Because i proved myself for it.
People think Life is a bed of roses for me,
I just think i have the slight edge because of luck,
Other than that,
Maybe i put more effort than you.
Lastly, a phone call last night disturbed me.
This girl left me for a more handsome guy.
Then the guy cheated on her while she was doing her attachment in Australia.
Now she asking me out for a date.
Direct huh?
I may not be handsome,
At least i’m faithful to my girlfriends.
I may have alot of female friends,
But each time, only one girl can be in my heart.
From the time i cross the road,
Approaching my block,
I will slow down my steps,
And walk slower.
I won’t rush to get in the lift,
I don’t mind even if i missed it and had to wait for the next one.
I take my time to press the button,
And take my time to reach the door.
Then the moment i open the door,
I speed up.
After keeping my shoes and greeting my parents,
I will get into my room.
Hear that no one is occupying the toilet,
Then hurry up take my bath,
And get back inside the room again.
Yup, this is it.
Quiet.
A little too quiet,
But i think they prefer it this way.
Recently, many things happening to friends around me,
But i was too busy to be with them due to the exams.
Anyway, i got alot to write,
But gonna summarise (cos bennie said i’m too lengthy)
Today i was watching tv and happened to flip over to channel U
Saw a bunch of small kids singing love songs,
Which gave me the chills and left me utterly disgusted.
But then it set me thinking.
Many would have said they are too young to sing such songs,
They are shameless enough to be singing such songs,
But i beg to differ,
In fact i think they should sing love songs.
Just because you are older in age,
Doesn’t mean if you got another half, then it’s true love.
For me, i think true love was during sch days.
That’s when love was pure and expect nothing in return.
That was when you blushed when you hold her hands,
When you both hold hands and feel so happy just walking at heartland malls,
Going to school together, sitting in bus,
Quarrelling only to make up after recess.
Those days were sweet, but unfortunately long gone.
Now? we look for partners who can provide for us.
Where got girls still interested to sit in mac with you to talk?
If you got no car, who wanna squeeze in the warm bus with you?
Life is that realistic.
In the past, walking was a pleasure.
Now?
Walking becomes a chore.
Comparing to the then and now,
Don’t you think when you were younger,
Those days u termed “puppy love”,
Were actually the days of our lives?
Now?
My conversation hardly leaves the word “money”,
I became more realistic and practical.
Love can wait.
In my sec sch days,
Were the days i enjoyed the most.
Who cares it’s a neighbourhood school?
Many of my friends are doing so well in Life now.
Life has been realli good for me.
Some people have been saying that i’m so lucky.
Always meeting the good stuffs.
But well, Life is fair.
You take some, you lose some.
Gotta work tomorrow.
First day in smart wear.
Feels uncomfortable,
Though i know i will look GOOD
I think it was a right decision to be a part time student.
Though the time is a little tight during exams,
You have to rush your lab reports all the time,
You may even have to forgo your social life.
When i was still a full time student,
Every wed, fri, sat will be heading to different clubs.
Come on, still remember the days of
ChinaBlack and Sparks disco?
Because of that,
I began to hate clubbing.
Yes, always bumping into old friends,
Drink, dance and get a babe’s no just makes it a bonus.
But that’s just all.
To go once in awhile, is quite okie,
But to head there weeks after weeks.
Now i don’t even go clubbing anymore.
Welcome Pubbing-era.
Then now is the kopi tiam era.
But i don’t like to see so many people.
Just group of 4 or just my best buddy is enough.
Talking about studying full-time,
The whole of last week i was on leave.
This week too.
But i slacked the entire week.
I realised i’m nt cut out to be a student.
I can’t study well at all.
What happened during O level days were a past.
From prelims 36 to Os of 13 points.
Right now, i feel bored.
And sick of mugging.
Coming out to the working world earlier,
Is definitely better.
Human is just so contradicting.
When let you work, you choose to study.
Now let you study, you wanna work.
But let you do both? You end up not feeling like doing anything.
Still got half a book to go.
But no mood at all.
Mayb this sem i adopted a new studying method.
And i think it’s working pretty not bad.
Just ask yourself:
What is this entire gist about the whole topic,
You know there are gonna be 3 essays coming out.
And you only need to answer one.
So why bother to prepare all 3?
This is call studying smart.
I will use to study very hard.
Trying to cover every book,
Then in the end, forgot what i just studied.
Passing is not a problem now,
Since 30% is out of coursework.
So basically you just need to hit 1 essay plus a few mcqs,
Ta-DAH.. gets you a D.
ask yourself, what is your ultimate goal?
Just to get the degree,
Or still dreaming about being a top student with 1st class honours?
Or just trying pass, and siam the supp paper.
Being a full time student like some other classmates,
Yes, you don’t work = more time.
But more time = more time to study?
Maybe for the hardworking, absolutely no for the not.
This is just a very boring post.
Cos i’m super duper bored.
Wanted to head out but don’t think can finish memorising.
Now just wasting time.
I will still feel gan cheong if i don’t finish flipping every page,
But i realised that i just need to know the gist of every topic,
Just aim to go in and do 1 essay and tat’s it.
That’s what happened for yesterday’s paper.
I went in with the thinking of doing only 1 essay.
Cos i believe 1 essay + few mcqs = enough for a D.
MCQ nt done,
The other essay don’t bother studying.
So i chose 2 essays to prepare.
AND?
both essays came out in the same section.
and i managed to complete 1 using the entire booklet of few pages.
Feels good to know you are not just writing half a page for your last section.
2nd essay?
I didn’t bother looking at the question.
So i happily finished my 1st essay,
Still got plenty of time.
So do my mcqs.
And surprisingly, i think i can get half or more of the 60qns right.
So feeling happier,
Though i know i got some points in my first essay is wrong,
But still, i tried my best.
Then with about 45mins to go,
I peeked at my 2nd essay.
Forgot the question but think like quoting 3 examples, etc…
In the end, i gave 2.
Comparing answers later,
Those 2 were correct!!
SURPRISE!!
Though it was a half past 6 kinda answers,
But hell yea, i nailed those.
So i came out feeling happier.
Those friends of mine who tried to swallow the 2 books,
Suffered a knock.
Because when you try to squeeze in so many details. IMPOSSSIBLE.
how to swallow 15 weeks of lectures into 1 day?
so for tomorrow’s papers,
I’m adopting the same method.
Section A is MCQs,
Section B is a compulsory calculation question,
Section C is to choose 1 of 3 long essays.
Section A? heck it.
Section B is compulsory.
So just go thru it tonight.
Section C is 1 out of 3.
Use backside will guess that,
Chromatography,
Electrophoresis,
Analyising Amino Acids will come out.
Even if wrong,
I bet i can nail 66.6% correctly.
So just study 2 topics lor.
Which means half a book only.
Then out of the 2 topics,
Ask urself what’s the gist of it?
Then focus on it.
Try writing and put drawings..
Drawings help me alot this time.
If it’s all just words, you will find it hard to memorise,
But if you put drawings, can gain marks too.
I’m done with electrophoresis.
Now flipping through for MCQs since i got the time,
Then tonight go thru calculations.
*p/s: this is only for people who wants to pass only. Not for A-star students.
Tomorrow is then the killer.
2 books from 2 semesters,
Coming in together for the kill.
But surprisingly, no one failed that module.
Will update tomorrow to see if i’m right about my choice of essays!!
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